by time and the unavoidable process of smug cultural self-flagellation responsible for that shit, I call dibs on writing the first biography of Hussie attempting to "place Homestuck in its context" after one begrudging watch of Con-Air which I'll spend mostly on my phone reading The Atlantic.

I'll fuck up explaining what instant messaging was, talk about how SBURB actually really definitely is a narrative about American income inequality, claim that it "uncannily predicted" the Broborger Wars of the 2030s. I'll entirely re-write my co-author's sections and now they want their name off there, but it's too late, HarperCollinsGlactoSmithKlineses has sold three million digital copies which are already running in many human brains' oneiro-buffers, loading my horseshit directly into their subconscious minds and forever overlaying their understanding of this great work and tumultous time with my own bullshit narrative. I'll diagnose him with whatever disease I'm preoccupied with right then.
Dave, Aradia, Damara, and Caliborn-as-Caliborn aren't programmers, so our options are basically,

1) the Squiddle/Outer God Time player (unlikely),

2) Lord English (probably most likely given that most software developers are in fact screaming space skulls),

3) some iteration of Aradiabot who downloaded a bunch of ~ATH tutorials into her robot brain and spent a few stable timeloops learning to code (likelihood???),

4) the Handmaid doing the same thing but without the robot brain (??????),

orrrrrr 5) some combination of these individuals angrily reversing one other's commits every five meaningless-Time-player-minutes.

Someone please draw fanart of this last possibility.
From a paralegal who knows something about confidential settlements in general, and nothing about the Hiveswap one in specific.

(I would appreciate it if any lawyers reading this correct me if I said anything fucked up.)

Q: Why could WP only comment via Kickstarter? That sounds skeevy.

A: I'm putting this up top because I've seen someone say it already, and I just wanted to say: There's a good reason for that.

I don't consider the reason a skeevy one on WP's side. More skeevy on the side of American Civil Law In General As It Is Currently Practiced (which is in fact very skeevy in a lot of ways!).

I'll get to that once I've gone over the basics.

Q: Is there going to be a trial?

A: No.

This was an out-of-court confidential settlement which is, from the sound of things already very much final. The legal process finished up offstage before we found out about it. Which is very common! Particularly in disagreements between two companies in which none of the damage was physical or visible out in public.

Q: Is there anything we can do?

A: Buy the game when it comes out, buy some merchandise in the meantime?

There is nothing that the Homestuck fandom in general, or (at least to my knowledge) the Kickstarter backers in specific can do about the legal situation.

Q: Why would What Pumpkin agree to settle something confidentially out-of-court unless they were hiding something?

A: People do that for a lot of reasons, but most commonly because - and this is something that's really unfair and that people argue about all the time - if you actually want to get any of your losses back within a reasonable time-frame, and you are not a massive corporation, it is your only option.

Read more... )
A woman is being hunted by people who will make millions more of her. She is not done growing to her final form, which is probably a dragon. She escapes into the sky in a small plastic laundry basket attached to a hot air balloon, with her python, which falls asleep wrapped around her.

The python is breathing out something that will make the woman sleep unaging until a safer era, and will fill their balloon and keep them safely in the sky until it comes. The woman covers them both in a blue blanket before she falls asleep herself.
You know damn well what you're supposed to do, you're supposed to SPRITE-MERGE WITH YOUR DOOMED ALT-SELF AGAIN COME ON

Apr. 16th, 2015 09:45 pm
...I guess we have a No-Ring-Required method of bringing Calliope back now!

Dec. 3rd, 2014 01:56 am
Where is my copy of Even A Monkey Can Draw Manga, I need it right now. I have a reason for needing this book.

Feb. 17th, 2014 09:04 pm
In Juunishistuck, the part of the coolkid who uses ironically bad art to make up for his low self-esteem will be played by Troll Murakami Takashi. He’ll be the Cock.

#fantrolls #i guess his name will be like #superf flatte #need to think about this #lonsom cowboy? #please do not google the phrase murakami lonesome cowboy #the result is just a big dick joke
It can't possibly be healthy. I'm editing your HOSTS file to block AO3. It's for your own good, dear.

(please don't read my fanfic)

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The contents of this blog and all comments I make are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike License. I hope that name is long enough. I could add some stuff. It could also be a Bring Me A Sandwich License.

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