Jan. 29th, 2015 08:30 am
*suddenly gets really mad at Cataclysm’s treatment of Thrall and Sylvanas four years later*
First couple chapters of a Warcraft OC fic set shortly after Cataclysm.

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So I wasn't aware of this unpleasant plotline in Westfall where you're solving a murder, which is about how homeless refugees are dirty criminals whom you should not try to help. It's cool if they're like, space aliens who crashed their ship, I guess, but not if they're human? There are starving children who've been reduced to robbing corpses, but they're evil children so you shouldn't worry about them. One of the fetchquests is a "funny" one which involves gathering hair and dirt for people to eat, while your bags are full of coyote meat and eggs from all the coyotes and birds you've been killing down the road.

I don't know about this game sometimes. At least they weren't hit by a hurricane.

(I would say, "at least they aren't all black," but I think the people who program these scenarios tend to forget they've even got dark skin colors available. Except when the black dwarves are being evil, which they always are.

And really, why can't you play as a Dark Iron dwarf? Their queen is 1/3 in charge of the dwarves at this point! The heir to Ironforge is half Dark Iron! And he's tiny and cute and in a cradle next to his mean mommy in the throne room, where he has to watch her get murdered over and over by Horde raids. Who could fail to sympathize with Fenran? His countrymen and -women need to be made playable to protect him.)
This is like my third attempt to get through the one where Varian Wrynn gets amnesiac and split in two like in Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. I just can't do it. Syaoran needs to sit him down and give him a stern talk about how to handle this sort of sitution. "Listen, Varian - no, listen, stop scrunching your face up in an agonized way like that. If neither of your halves are interesting in themselves, then the fact that they're the same person will not be interesting, either. And this sort of Jungian double thing really works better if both halves have consistent personalities and motivations from one page to the next."

I've decided that Varian envied Thrall's backstory and wanted it for himself, and thus the whole thing where he got himself enslaved and became a gladiator was planned and intentional. He just wanted to be more like Thrall! This is my new mental canon.
I have not been studying Japanese, working seriously on any of my writing or translation projects, or working at all on my coding project. I have not been reading books, reading manga, or blogging substantively about the things that I do read. I have not been cooking or exercising. I haven't done my laundry. I tried to make a white-haired Blood Elf Hunter named Sybel, catch a boar, lion, panther, couple of birds, and dragonhawk for her, and name them Cyrin, Gules, Moriah, Ter, Tirlith, and Gyld; "Sybel" was taken.

But I totally did convince Mom to read Boatmurdered.
Hence, lots of Warcraft.

Today I was being a low-level Orc Hunter. I had a lion pet named Gules, for obvious reasons. A Troll Hunter came up to me with another lion. This is what he said:

Guy: Hey.
Guy: Look at my lion!
Guy: He's WHITE! :D
Me: Is it from that Ekkayekee quest, or however it's spelled?
(I notice what the lion's name is.)
Me: Oh, apparently so.
Guy: lol
Guy: indeed he is.
Me: Congratulations on your white lion!

Poll #8000 How old was the Troll?
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 14

How old was the Troll?

View Answers

1 (7.1%)

6 (42.9%)

2 (14.3%)

5 (35.7%)

New Orgrimmar is very sad. I feel all homesick for old Orgrimmar. Where did Saurfang go? He's gone! And Grommash Hold is now where the bank used to be, which is extremely weird. I kind of expect to be able to ask Garrosh to hold on to my old armor.

(Actually, I will do that anyway. Garrosh! Take my cloak.)

And Zamja the cooking trainer's shop is still there, but she's not in it anymore. She's kind of standing on a dock with a bunch of mudskippers now. She's the only trainer-NPC whose name I ever remember, and she's not where she should be! I'm extremely upset.
And sometimes this is unfortunate, because if it were, all we'd need to do about the hurricane would be this: I could go kite Malfurion over to the eye, and some Alliance person could do the same to Thrall, and they'd probably deal with it before they started fighting each other.

I'm sure Anderson Cooper would report on this in a neutral manner, without letting his elven heritage bias him.
Cataclysm is coming out soon. I cannot be permitted to restart my subscription to see what the lead-up events are like. I'm probably not high enough level to access most of them, but I will be sucked back in nonetheless. My heart will be broken by the Orgrimmar redesign. My nerves will be shattered anew by the ethnic stereotypes and poor storytelling decisions. Dudes will say stuff about my hat.

The Jewish stereotype race’s innate skills will include “Best Deals Anywhere” and “Time Is Money.”

The fact that I play this game is giving me, like, complexes.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

Had two anxiety dreams last night, then went back to sleep and had a Warcraft dream. I was a Blood Elf attempting to control my demoralized Horde scouting party in the Swamp of Sorrows, where a disaster had taken place, and some sort of level-?? sentient gas creature was stalking the Horde and Alliance in the area.

Cut because I'm sitting here posting about my frigging Warcraft dream. )

This is not a particularly interesting dream, but it amuses me how clear my subconscious was about everyone’s classes and gear. Also, that it made the Dark Iron dwarves nice and helpful to the defectors - clearly it is impatient with this creepy The Black Dwarves And Tauren Are Evil shit of Blizzard’s. I just wish it had specified whether or not the Blood Elf’s name was Guildenstern.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

I dreamed that Obama was forced to participate in a gladiatorial competition, and he gave away his true identity when he was forced to use his signature martial arts move to end a fight.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

Expansion spoilers again.

Read the rest of this entry » )

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

Apparently there have been leaks about the next WoW expansion?

I can tell I’m not really invested in the canonical WoW storyline because:

1) It didn’t even occur to me not to read the spoilers. It didn’t even occur to me to consider them spoilers. I guess that on some level, I do not feel a story is being told here.

2) My big reaction to the Big Major Spoiler that totally shifts the sociopolitical balance of the game’s society was not “wow, that totally shifts the sociopolitical balance of the game’s society!” but rather “man, that totally screws up my awesome fanfic.”

The exciting plot news is that…

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(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

So we’ve got Varian Wrynn who leads the humans, and Thrall who leads the orcs. And Thrall is the nice one who reads books and sincerely regrets the necessity of ripping your legs off, and Varian is the angry one who yells “traitor!” a lot and whose ten-year-old* keeps having to talk him down.** And they’ve got to have their angsty backstory to explain how they turned out like this, of course.

But why is it the same backstory? Is being enslaved and forced to become a gladiator just some kind of rite of passage in Azeroth?

* I think the endgame plan is probably that Thrall and Prince Anduin get married.

** If the description of their personalities sounds intriguing to you, please just like… imagine the story you want to go there. You do not want to try and read the books. I promise.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

There used to be an empty lot I had to go through on my way to the mall. One morning at the end of March or beginning of April, still sleepy, I was walking to the mall, and found that there was suddenly construction in that lot. Cement had been poured, and the ground was higher than it had been. This seemed unlikely to me; for a moment I wasn’t sure if I was in the real world or in a video game. I tried to check my inventory.

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(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

but I can’t right now because I’m craving feta cheese, and in addition to making me sick, feta cheese is 1200 yen.

I also need to buy tea. Going home and drinking my Celestial Seasonings green tea has brought me to the unwelcome realization that the Japanese brand I usually drink is awful. So I’ll probably have to go to the special-special tea booth at the front of the grocery and let the Tea Lady look down at me superciliously from the block she stands on, as I squint my jet-lagged eyes at my DS stylus, fumblingly typing in tea terms. She’ll probably gesture with her apron.

It’s been a month, and I was doing fine. But the World of Warcraft withdrawal’s hitting me again. Every once in a while my fingers twitch out the keyboard shortcut sequence for Hunter’s Mark, then Serpent Sting, then Arcane Shot. At odd moments I find myself anxiously recalculating whether the blue neck attachment I’m wearing is really optimal for my DPS, trying to remember whether I still have my old green one in the bank.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

My orcish hunter has had a pig for a pet since the beginning of the game, but I never named it because I could never think of anything I liked enough. I was in the Hinterlands today, and this obviously led me to think about Song for the Basilisk (and how Luna Pellior is the most McKillip-y name McKillip’s ever done), which obviously made me think about the Riddlemaster books (and how there is probably Morgon/Astrin fanfic), which led me to the realization that my level-53 pig’s name should be Hegdis-Noon, the Talking Pig of Hel.

Though that wouldn’t fit, so he’s just Hegdisnoon.

(Originally published at SarahPin.com. You can comment here or there.)

Self-destructively, I finished the second of Carol Berg’s Rai-kirah books and am working on the third. This is the basic plot progression of the series. I’m spoiling everything right here! Click on the cut only if you wish to bask in the brilliance of the best plot arc ever!

(The most recent Penny Arcade may be relevant to this post’s interests.)

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(Originally published at SarahPin.com. You can comment here or there.)

Candida the Elf

One must hope that Candida the Elf’s guildmates will organize a whip-around for the $25 name-change fee.

(Originally published at SarahPin.com. You can comment here or there.)

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