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I just asked
thegeekgene what I did yesterday, because I realized that I couldn't remember anything beyond getting some more blood drawn in the morning and getting drunk late at night.
I chose to get drunk because I hadn't been able to sleep through the night in at least a week, and it was causing problems. Like, not being able to remember what I've been doing. Drunkenness tends to enhance the efficacy of my sleeping pill - but I don't actually like getting drunk, so I don't usually do that. However, the plan worked, and I slept eleven hours. I felt better today, but I'm still pretty vague and tired.
I don't know if I want the blood tests to come back with anything or not? If there's nothing there, then there's nothing to do but keep fucking around with antidepressants until I hit something that works. If there is something there, it might be fixable! But it might be fixable in ways that are very unpleasant. My friend Jenan, who'd been sick and depressed throughout college, got diagnosed with thyroid cancer right after we graduated six years ago. She's still getting radiation treatment regularly, and she'll be on thyroid hormone replacement meds for the rest of her life. I'd prefer to be mysteriously fucked-up for no good reason.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I chose to get drunk because I hadn't been able to sleep through the night in at least a week, and it was causing problems. Like, not being able to remember what I've been doing. Drunkenness tends to enhance the efficacy of my sleeping pill - but I don't actually like getting drunk, so I don't usually do that. However, the plan worked, and I slept eleven hours. I felt better today, but I'm still pretty vague and tired.
I don't know if I want the blood tests to come back with anything or not? If there's nothing there, then there's nothing to do but keep fucking around with antidepressants until I hit something that works. If there is something there, it might be fixable! But it might be fixable in ways that are very unpleasant. My friend Jenan, who'd been sick and depressed throughout college, got diagnosed with thyroid cancer right after we graduated six years ago. She's still getting radiation treatment regularly, and she'll be on thyroid hormone replacement meds for the rest of her life. I'd prefer to be mysteriously fucked-up for no good reason.
no subject
Date: 2013-06-16 03:03 am (UTC)*hugs*