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The optimally-healthy relationship path for Hawke is “piss off some fucking wizards.”

# i am replaying with the aim of pissing off anders and merrill to the greatest possible extent # without also pissing off aveline # aka 'the only decent person in the room'

Going to lie facedown in the trash until the plot of Battle Angel Alita starts up around me.

Going off the Lamictal all at once may not have been the best way of doing it.

# the implication of this post is that my head has been removed from my body # and my brain is in suspended animation # in the bible belt # all completely accurate

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The problem with having been intermittently psychotic for like a third of my life is that people do take the stupid bullshit I say seriously sometimes.

Once in college I went to the campus health center with a really bad throat infection. I could barely talk and sounded like Darth Vader when I did. When a nurse asked me “what seems to be the problem,” I said, feeling that what seemed to be the problem was obvious, “I guess I have, like, throat demons.”

Even had sarcasm been strictly necessary in this circumstance, I know there must have been a funnier way to phrase this. In my defense, I had a very high fever.

I then waited a long time in a daze, wondering idly what was going on, until a psychiatric nurse she’d summoned came in and said “so let’s talk about these demons.”

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*Attempts to restrain self from writing ashen Fenris/Hawke/Isabela/Anders shit in which Hawke and Isabela are taking turns being the middle leaf and fucking up in basically similar ways because they both have the emotional intelligence of purebred Saint Bernards.*