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My Seer of Doom powers come with a price.
Maybe? Maybe I'm being paranoid. I just worry that being an effective Seer may require developing a substance abuse problem.
Kratom makes it so much easier for me to function that I'm scared to take it recently. I've skipped it for three days because I've been writing stuff about Rose sneaking around hiding her drinking, and going "oh fuck what if I get dependent and get like that."
I only took some tonight because I was thinking about friggin' Oankali and didn't want nightmares about that specific thing. I'm at my sisters' house, and it would be rude to wake them shouting about alien tentacle rape. But now that I've taken it I feel 100% less fucked-up than I did the rest of the day.
On the other hand, if I stopped being the anxious and neurotic person that I am, I might become the highly-susceptible-to-addiction person that I'm afraid of being.
Kratom makes it so much easier for me to function that I'm scared to take it recently. I've skipped it for three days because I've been writing stuff about Rose sneaking around hiding her drinking, and going "oh fuck what if I get dependent and get like that."
I only took some tonight because I was thinking about friggin' Oankali and didn't want nightmares about that specific thing. I'm at my sisters' house, and it would be rude to wake them shouting about alien tentacle rape. But now that I've taken it I feel 100% less fucked-up than I did the rest of the day.
On the other hand, if I stopped being the anxious and neurotic person that I am, I might become the highly-susceptible-to-addiction person that I'm afraid of being.