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Entry tags:
why is pet ownership so hard
Terrible Neurotic Half-Feral Old Murdercat: *pees blood all over kitchen counter*
Me: OH SHIT
Me: HOW AM I GOING TO GET YOU IN A CARRIER CAT
Me: YOU DESTROY EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH, INCLUDING MY TOES, FREQUENTLY
*I shut him in a room, go find the dog-sized carrier, bring it in there, and go to get a towel. When I return, he is stepping daintily into the carrier. I shut the door behind him.*
Me: OH SHIT
Me: IT'S SATURDAY EVENING THE VET IS CLOSED
Me: *calls vet on her cell*
Me: *has the vet's cell number in her phone, obviously*
Vet: Calm down. Describe his behavior to me.
Me: HE TRIED TO DOUBLE KILL ME
Me: CLAWS AND TEETH ALIKE WERE UTILIZED
Me: SUBSEQUENTLY HE DID A BACKFLIP INTO THE SINK
Me: So yeah, he's acting normal, but I just noticed he peed blood in the shower, too. It formed a happy face, so I think he's making fun of me.
Vet: Yeah, probably, but it sounds like he's just got a UTI. Do you still have like a zillion antibiotics lying around from the rest of your diseased elderly menagerie? Try and get some of those into him and bring him in on Monday.
Me: Okay.
It's Monday now! I cannot find the goddamn cat. And when I do, there is no way that he is going to walk calmly into that fucking carrier a second time.
I need my Old Republic character to loan me her armor, or at least her mook.
Me: OH SHIT
Me: HOW AM I GOING TO GET YOU IN A CARRIER CAT
Me: YOU DESTROY EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH, INCLUDING MY TOES, FREQUENTLY
*I shut him in a room, go find the dog-sized carrier, bring it in there, and go to get a towel. When I return, he is stepping daintily into the carrier. I shut the door behind him.*
Me: OH SHIT
Me: IT'S SATURDAY EVENING THE VET IS CLOSED
Me: *calls vet on her cell*
Me: *has the vet's cell number in her phone, obviously*
Vet: Calm down. Describe his behavior to me.
Me: HE TRIED TO DOUBLE KILL ME
Me: CLAWS AND TEETH ALIKE WERE UTILIZED
Me: SUBSEQUENTLY HE DID A BACKFLIP INTO THE SINK
Me: So yeah, he's acting normal, but I just noticed he peed blood in the shower, too. It formed a happy face, so I think he's making fun of me.
Vet: Yeah, probably, but it sounds like he's just got a UTI. Do you still have like a zillion antibiotics lying around from the rest of your diseased elderly menagerie? Try and get some of those into him and bring him in on Monday.
Me: Okay.
It's Monday now! I cannot find the goddamn cat. And when I do, there is no way that he is going to walk calmly into that fucking carrier a second time.
I need my Old Republic character to loan me her armor, or at least her mook.