I Am Completely Serious

thegeekgene says stuff.

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 02:14:10 GMT

thegeekgene: - and Princess Moon Plagiarist's other works include -

Me: "Princess Moon Plagiarist?"

thegeekgene: Huh?

Me: You just called somebody "Princess Moon Plagiarist."

thegeekgene: Princess Bride Plagiarist. Because she plagiarized from The Princess Bride. But she did write this vaguely European fantasy story where everyone has Japanese names, so.

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Heard from one of the stages at the DC Cherry Blossom Festival:

Sun, 11 Apr 2010 07:30:30 GMT

Female Announcer: - if you're interested, check out "www dot japan slash US something something dot com"!

Male Announcer: I think you mean, "japan dash US." I don't think they want to go to that other website.

Female Announcer: Oh - no-no-no! We definitely don't want to encourage people to go to that website!

I don't see what their problem is, it sounds like a perfectly respectable site.

(I was near a bunch of older tourists when this was announced, and was, as far as I could judge from the bemused expressions surrounding me, the only person who had any idea what they were talking about. I'm sure I'd have heard some Hetalia comments had any of the many cosplayers been in my vicinity.)

There was a yosakoi dance group called "10tecomai," and the way the announcer pronounced it, I think everyone in the place interpreted this name as "Tentacle Mai."

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I had no trouble at all parsing this question.

Fri, 27 Nov 2009 17:34:19 GMT

Upon telling Dad to choose between two different SD cards for his camera:

Dad: Is one jig-a-big a big?

Me: Yes.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

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Non-conversations with Jenan.

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 04:00:13 GMT

[19:30] Jenan is offline.
[19:31] Snarp: Going to get food; be back on in a minute.
[19:31] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:35] Snarp: Back.
[19:35] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:36] Snarp: I’m just going to say random facts at your IM, okay?
[19:36] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:36] Snarp: Pumpkin pie should be cooked at a high temperature for the first few minutes to set it, then turned about 50 degrees lower.
[19:36] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:37] Snarp: Waterproofing shoes when you first get them is always a good idea.
[19:37] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:38] Snarp: Large breeds of dogs shouldn’t be fed puppy food as puppies; it’s too high in fat for them, and will make them put on weight too quickly, damaging their bone density.
[19:38] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:40] Snarp: Trust not in the promises of elvenkind.
[19:40] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:45] Snarp: And unattended space heaters are one of the leading causes of house fires.
[19:45] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.
[19:45] Snarp: Okay, I need to get off now because I’m all Benadryled up and falling asleep. SEND ME BEE PHOTOS.
[19:45] Second Life: User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.

(Context: Jenan is always late getting on Second Life, and I’m all Benadryled up.)

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

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Conversations with Dad.

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 02:11:37 GMT

Dad: So you need to email your sister and ask her if she wants to come with us when we go down to Nashville - tell her she has to drive down and meet us, it’ll be Friday the 13th - is that right? We’ll be leaving on the 13th?

Me: Do you want your youngest daughter driving all by herself on Friday the 13th!? You’re a terrible father!

Dad: I don’t know, maybe not… I’m going to have to think about this now…

Interviewer on TV: [name], who is running for [office], says he’s not a politician, he’s just a concerned citizen who -

Me: *mutes the TV*

Dad: Sarah! Don’t mute this guy! He’s a concerned citizen! He’s running for office, he’s got the IQ of a small bird - he’s a great American!

Me: *repeatedly mutes commercials*

Dad: *repeatedly unmutes them* You’re as bad as your grandmother! She muted commercials and black people.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

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Dad didn’t have swine flu.

Fri, 18 Sep 2009 21:27:47 GMT

Shortly after I made this post theorizing that Dad might have caught swine flu at a legal conference, Papaw got a call from Uncle Tall. Uncle Tall told him that two people had died of swine flu in the town where the legal conference had been.

Languishing pathetically in bed, Dad told me, “Now, when I die of swine flu, you’re going to have to go to law school and take over my firm, so there’ll still be a Pin in “Pin, Fork and Spoon Law Offices.”"

Me: “You’re not going to die, you’re not even in a high-risk group. And I’m not going to law school. And it would be “Fork, Spoon and Pin,” because I wouldn’t be the senior partner.”

Dad frowned.

Some time later, he called me back into the sickroom. “Sarah! When I die, they don’t have to change the name. A lot of firms leave the name of a dead attorney in there. I can still be in there even when I die.”

“You’re not going to die, Dad -”

“So it’ll be Pin, Fork, Spoon, and Pin. Except you need to fire Fork, because he’s pissing me off, so it’ll just be Pin, Spoon and Pin.”

“I’m not going to law school, and I can’t fire Fork. He’d have seniority over me. And that’s not how law firms work anyway.”

Dad frowned again. But he could not come up with any way out of this quandary. He had the same conversation again later when thegeekgene called.

But he got better within two days, so, probably not swine flu.

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

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Cruelty to dads

Fri, 14 Aug 2009 15:57:40 GMT

via the Gmail chat box.

me: HI DAD
me: THE COMPUTER IS TALKING TO YOU
me: ISN’T THAT FRIGHTENING

(47 minutes later)

Dad: what is this?
me: It is an instant messenger, Dad.
me: And you just logged off of Gmail, so you can no longer receive my messages.

(11 minutes later)

Dad: are you ok/ the fact that you are instant messaging is that a crisis?

(I just discovered I have tag called “dear don’t blog that your father reads this” and I have no recollection of creating it. It’s never been used before. I guess Mom must have been involved.)

(Crossposted to SarahPin.com, Dreamwidth, and LiveJournal. You can leave comments at whichever.)

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