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1) Why is it totally impossible to use sarcastic dialog options with Anders and Fenris when they're full of shit. Why do they have to do the tragic faces. It's exhausting.

"Don't you understand my deep deep pain" yes guys you've given me a decent working knowledge of your deep deep pains by now I think. I am going to check all the shops to see if there is a "sense of proportion" upgrade available.

2) Do we find out at the end that Varric made up their tragic backstories after reading a pile of manga. In the final scene is one of them sarcastically reading the other's fictionalized lines aloud, while the other engages in dwarf tossing.

3) Merrill needs to be in the party at all times so that she can get ASD all over everything.

4) But she is wayyyyyy too emotionally immature for it to be responsible for any variation of Hawke to get romantically involved with her. Not really much in common with the way she acted in Origins! Maybe the doom mirror gives you brain problems. Tamlen just started playing Dwarf Fortress and never stopped, is what happened to him.

5) Aveline is the only character not completely off their gourd, which of course means that she is not a romance option.

6) Fenris's "Bitter Pill" questline was fucking brutal. As was Aveline's "Long Road," but that was in, you know, a different and more exasperating way.
snarp: small cute androgynous android crossing arms and looking very serious (Default)
Is it just that I modded it too much. I just got an ending which only makes sense if Morrigan sabotaged the kingdom by giving everyone embarassing memory and perceptual problems.

Read more... )
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I'm really disappointed that the women don't really have non-antagonistic conversations with each other. Leliana and Wynne are the only ones who don't actively dislike each other - Shale and Leliana have a single mostly-positive conversation about shoes, and that's it.

(And Shale seems really ambivalent about the necessity of the whole gender thing, so I'm not sure I should even count them in this unfortunate little census.)

The antagonistic discussions mostly aren't even funny. Nearly half of Leliana and Morrigan's written dialog is just them fucking competing over a male Warden. I don't understand the mindset that would make someone spend so much more time on that than on Leliana hassling Morrigan about shapeshifting or Morrigan egging Leliana on about killing dudes she's fucked. The straight men must be stopped.

Zevran and Alistair don't do the same thing, either - they only have one fighting-over-the-girl conversation, whereas Morrigan and Leliana have nine fighting-over-the-guy ones. And it would make a lot more sense if the reverse was the case? Alistair is the World's Most Insecure Man, and Zevran likes messing with him.

Whereas Leliana wants to be friends with literally everyone, and it doesn't make sense to me that Morrigan would air that sort of grievance in public. She hides away from everyone else at camp, and complains to the Warden when they ask her "personal" questions anywhere else.

On the plus side, Shale and Sten almost accidentally propose, Morrigan clearly wanted to rescue Sten specifically to get a guy she considers hate-fuckable into the party, spoilers )
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My ideal ending to DA:O is the one with the highest possible number of awful conversations, so I probably need to script a mod in which you can conscript and romance Branka.
snarp: small cute androgynous android crossing arms and looking very serious (Default)
*wakes up shortly before dawn*

me: Oh hey, Dragon Age: Origins is basically grimdark Chrono Trigger, like it has the same basic narrative structure and similar plot branch points, but the alternate scenarios are fleshed out more, which unfortunately makes them less emotionally-plausible rather than more at a number of crucial points in the narrative

*goes back to sleep*

*alarm goes off a few hours later*

me: Fuck this game I hate it now
snarp: small cute androgynous android crossing arms and looking very serious (Default)
Alistair's character arc: "this guy is like eight years old emotionally, is terrified of independence and has no self-confidence when not being led, panics and turns it over to his junior colleague literally every single time he's ever asked to make a decision, and is now in charge of the country."
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If you google “dragon age mod put a shirt on morrigan” the first hit is for a mod that instead pops her boobs the rest of the way out.

I am going to make a mod that switches her upper-body garments with Alistair’s lower-body garments in order to hurt the feelings of the straight men responsible for this.
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but I'm going to get up in a minute because The Fade is making me very queasy and very angry.
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Today I am consuming only bread and bananas due to the Blight. Which is what's going on my stomach right now. I assume that the Gray Wardens will be here shortly to get a weirdly-uniform overlay of my spattered blood on their armor textures.
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is it possible for me to reverse-auspistice Morrigan and Alistair into falling into hatelove?
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Dwarf Fortress screenshot showing the text 'A kea has stolen a pecan wood stepladder! A kea has stolen a sand pear wood stepladder!'

fucking keas

they think they can do whatever they want.
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What the hell is this game's preoccupation with killing off cute little animals.

Don't pick up the quest "The Pet of Your Dreams" in Draumheim. It's almost worse than when they gratuitously offed Tasuil the Corgi Adventurer. I did not need to see that shit.

Stuff.

Dec. 4th, 2014 07:26 pm
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1) Dubiety the Cat has not sharpened his claws for a pretty long time; he won't use the carpet post, and he's figured out that he's not allowed to mess with the couch. I unfortunately probably can't let him go outdoors to use a tree, given the horrific wounds I keep seeing on the neighborhood strays. (I tried to catch the friendly tuxedo-cat to take him to the shelter the other day, but while he's okay with being held and petted, he flips out when I start walking while he's in my arms.)

So I was trying to pick the old claw layers off Dubiety myself, to keep them from getting ingrown, and. Well. That's not going to work out unless I get a suit of fucking armor.

I'm think I'm going to get some sisal rope and a board, wrap the rope around the board, and lean it against the couch where he tries to scratch sometimes. Maybe that'll work for him.

2) I messed with the RIFT expansion a little today. It occasionally forgets that it takes place in the Plane of Water and spawns invasions from the Plane of Water, because it's fucking RIFT and nothing makes any sense.

The Big Bad says "this place shall become one with the Plane of Water!" I have some good news for you, buddy.

3) Today I ate a can of soup that ostensibly expired in early 2012. I'm fine.
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I've never played Dragon Age, and decided to rectify that in a dream last night. This spell was usable.

Me in the dream: Hahaha wow, no wonder this series is so popular.
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I dreamed that a little boy was searching a video game for his father, and I was with him in the guise of the corgi who follows you around in Rift. He found his father, but he was moving around in ways that did not sync up to his walk animation, and the boy couldn't get close enough to him to hug him, and I kept losing small amounts of HP.

I finally realized that the animations and dialog for the "Find Father" sequence had somehow been applied to a Rare mob, a giant alligator with a distinctive movement pattern and AOE attack that I'd fought before. I had to kill it, presumably with some secret corgi jutsu, just as the boy was about to hug his "father." He dropped an alligator-tooth necklace that raised spell attack power.

Why was the alligator wearing an alligator tooth necklace, who knows.
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When you hit level 50, the city throws you a party, where you have to fight a big death-spider from another dimension and watch Uriel and Kira's marriage disintegrating. It's not a very good party. Adriana even doesn't even show up, I guess she's too busy being an Attack on Titan character up in Stillmoor.
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Studies have shown that, in 80% of lesbian divorces, one or both individuals state the grounds for divorce to be "evil space dragons."
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I am actually kind of invested in Uriel and Kira's relationship in RIFT? This would be less annoying if the quest-line wasn't so broken. I actually missed the big betrayal scene because it didn't play when it was supposed to.
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is running a low-level alt to a high-level crafting quest turn-in point. It's like playing a stealth game with a mysterious preoccupation with squirrels.

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