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So, I got my Jmanga reimbursement this morning. It was only a dollar on Amazon,but considering that I had less than a hundred points on the site and wasn’t expecting anything, a dollar is pretty generous of them. They weren’t obligated to reimburse me anything.

Actually, they were. That's why they did it.

They didn't give refunds for the manga people "bought" from them because there have been no really major court smackdowns about that sort of crap.

There will be some people who will point fingers and gloat about having not purchased any manga with JManga. To me, it’s about the equivalent of seeing a movie in the theater. I paid a price and enjoyed the media. In fact, reading a manga on JManga was less than half the cost of seeing a movie.

Ms. Friedman, you are a treasure to that internet demographic preoccupied with swordfighting lesbian schoolgirls (me), but this is bullshit. JManga was deliberately marketing towards people who didn't know enough about the internet to realize that the manga they'd bought was going to disappear on them.

"I knew this would happen. I’m so glad I didn’t spend money there."

And my only response is - of course they failed! You didn’t spend money there. If the amount of people I’ve seen said the above in some way shape or form used the service, it would still be running. Easily.

Services like this cost money to run, and if there are no customers - it can’t run.

I know folks complained about the points system, but it really wasn’t that bad - it even worked out to benefit when JManga ran sales and gave out free bonus points.

Supervillain Protip: If you need to disable an economist for long enough to, like, steal the economy? Make them read that crap right there. I learned this handy trick from Lex Luthor.
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No, read the Wikipedia article.

On 2 September 1967, the fort was occupied by Major Paddy Roy Bates, a British subject and pirate radio broadcaster, who ejected a competing group of pirate broadcasters. Bates intended to broadcast his pirate radio station, Radio Essex, from the platform.

In 1968, British workmen entered what Bates claimed to be his territorial waters in order to service a navigational buoy near the platform. Michael Bates (son of Paddy Roy Bates) tried to scare the workmen off by firing warning shots from the former fort.

As Bates was a British subject at the time, he was summoned to court in England on firearms charges following the incident. But the court ruled that as the platform (which Bates was now calling "Sealand") was outside British jurisdiction, being beyond the then three-mile limit of the country's waters, the case could not proceed. In 1975, Bates introduced a constitution for Sealand, followed by a flag, a national anthem, a currency and passports.


I don't think any of the clients have ever claimed that their crimes took place in sovereign nations and then actually made a flag. Just the first part.

In August 1978, while Bates and his wife were in England, Alexander Achenbach, who describes himself as the Prime Minister of Sealand, hired several German and Dutch mercenaries to spearhead an attack of Roughs Tower. They stormed the tower with speedboats, jet skis and helicopters, and took Bates' son hostage. Bates was able to retake the tower and capture Achenbach and the mercenaries. Achenbach, a German lawyer who held a Sealand passport, was charged with treason against Sealand and was held unless he paid DM 75,000 (more than US$35,000 or £23,000).

The governments of the Netherlands, Austria and Germany petitioned the British government for his release, but the United Kingdom disavowed his imprisonment, citing the 1968 court decision. Germany then sent a diplomat from its London embassy to Roughs Tower to negotiate for Achenbach's release. Roy Bates relented after several weeks of negotiations and subsequently claimed that the diplomat's visit constituted de facto recognition of Sealand by Germany.

Following his repatriation, Achenbach and Gernot Pütz established a "government in exile", sometimes known as the Sealand Rebel Government, or Sealandic Rebel Government, in Germany. Achenbach's appointed successor, Johannes Seiger, continues to claim via his website that he is Sealand's legitimate ruling authority.


And

2007–2010: Sealand was offered for sale through the Spanish estate company InmoNaranja. Since a principality cannot technically be sold, Sealand's current owners plan to transfer "custodianship". The asking price is €750 million (£600 million, US$906 million).

2012: Sealand online casino is expected to be opened by late 2012.[dated info]

9 October 2012: Roy Bates, Prince of Sealand, died after suffering Alzheimer's disease for several years. He was succeeded by his son Michael.


So I'm picturing Roy and Michael Bates as Jake and Jade, and Achenbach and Seiger as Dirk and Dave. Just, like, invading the place every year for their birthday present.
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Suddenly I have listened to this Florence and the Machine CD like five times, because of this.

I keep wanting to call them Florence vs the Machine. On some level I think that I view all encounters with all machines as being intrinsically hostile in nature. I should like, set up a camera in the kitchen to see if I subliminally narrow my eyes and grit my teeth every time I glance at the microwave.
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It turns out that I will read unrelentingly grim milSF, if it is presented to me in the form of Homestuck fanfic about Sollux. This is like finding a zero-day exploit, right here.

(I identify a little too much with Sollux, despite his relatively thin characterization, because he is an ill-tempered programmer who hears voices; I even used to have a lisp. Though at no time in my career as a speech therapy patient did I choose to type in it.)
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Who thought it was a good idea to make a shitload of Harlequin manga in the first place? Why does it comprise like 3/4 of the josei catalog? Does anyone under the age of sixty even read Harlequins? It just seems like a huge demographic mismatch.

Screenshot of Harlequin manga covers with Facebook 'like' boxes on top; one of them, 'Keeping Luke's Secret,' has received a single lonely 'like'.

(those facebook like boxes)

Look at these awful titles:

The Italian Playboy's Secret Son

Sale or Return Bride

The Italian's Passionate Revenge (oh, no! Same Italian?)

The Sheikh's Reluctant Bride

The Sheikh's Contract Bride (the sheikh is keeping busy)

The Billionaire's Virgin Mistress

Married By Mistake! (okay, yeah, that sounds like a manga)

Purchased For Revenge (that, too)

The Forced Bride (this fucking genre, my god)

Cowboys, Babies, and Shotgun Vows (well that sounds crazy fucking romantic)

The Italian's Token Wife (you know it is exactly this sort of behavior that got you guys stuck with Silvio Berlusconi for like nine years)

The Billionaire Boss's Forbidden Mistress (no one forbids the Billionaire Boss! Mistresses, that is. No one forbids him mistresses.)

Pregnant by the Millionaire (she should have held out for the billionaire)

Royally Bedded, Regally Wedded (or maybe whoever this guy is)

The Sheikh's Ransomed Bride (geez sheikh how many of those do you even need)

The Spanish Duke's Virgin Bride (new nationality here, so this story must be completely different from every single one of the others)

The Millionaire's Pregnant Mistress (is this the same as that other millionaire-baby one but retitled? No, it looks like it's different.)

A Date With a Billionaire (she gets a look at his cell phone while he's in the bathroom and the address book is just "virgin one," "pregnant one," "forbidden one," so she walks out and calls up the cowboy. The cowboy is such a good listener.)

Mistress Bought and Paid For (goddamn we are purchasing a lot of fucking women in these stories, what the hell is wrong with Harlequin)

To Marry a Stranger (the stranger has an eyepatch, so yeah this is basically a manga, sure)

Marriage Scandal, Showbiz Baby! (the scandal is that the baby is a reincarnated vengeful alien ghost, right? Because it's manga. Right?)

Claiming His Pregnant Wife (this sounds like a tagline given to a murder by an awful local news station)

Public Wife, Private Mistress (that's generally how it works yeah)

Traded to the Sheikh (I'll bet it was the Spanish Duke initiating this arrangement, I never trusted that guy)

The Billionaire's Secret Baby (oh we all know the billionaire sucks at keeping secrets)

A Wife in Time (I'm unfortunately pretty sure that this isn't about time travel, how are these even manga)

Princess of Convenience (that doesn't even make sense)

The Stanbury Crown, Royally Wed IV - An Officer and a Princess (oh god so someone felt there needed to be three other manga about the royalty of someplace called Stanbury getting married over and fucking over? I bet there are white horses with frilly tack involved.)

Wife By Agreement (well, that's a pleasant first)

The Stanbury Crown, Royally Wed II - The Blacksheep Prince's Bride (there's supposed to be a space in "black sheep" you terrible prince)

The Stanbury Crown, Royally Wed III - Code Name: Prince ("dude that is the shittiest codename" "look do you want to have a goddamn frilly horse wedding or not")

To Woo a Wife (this is really fucking progressive for these things)

The Stanbury Crown, Royally Wed I - The Expectant Princess ("i am expecting to give birth to a secret fucking agent")

Billionaire Bachelors: Stone (maybe the billionaire bachelors are like, elementally-themed, and they're a team of chosen warriors who fight evil together? Because it's manga.)

In The Arms of the Sheikh ("oh baby i have three or four wives already" "that is so hot")

The Celebrity Doctor's Proposal ("oh baby i want to surgically alter your vulva to be more symmetrical, and also marry you maybe" "no i am going to go see if the sheikh's got any spots open")

Million Dollar Men II - Millionaire Husband (these guys are the Monthly GFantasy knockoff of the Billionaire Bachelors)

Million Dollar Men III - The Millionaire's Secret Wish ("man i wish i was a billionaire bachelor, they have that cool elemental thing going on and takahiro sakurai voices one of them in the anime")

Million Dollar Men I - Expecting the Boss's Baby (there are three dudes on the cover of this one, I'm confident that it's mpreg and not just an establishing shot of this crappy hero team together)

Angus's Lost Lady (gonna pretend this is about some cows)

Daniel and Daughter (uh)
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Even very short distances. Maybe it would stress me out less if I just brought my tea paraphernalia with me. Plug the electric kettle into the dashboard, cool the water to exactly 180 F by pouring it between two travel cups, and so on. Actually, that's a great idea with no conceivable drawbacks, I'm totally going to do that.

Unrelated Homestuck stuff: Everything Is Worse With Reddit. I will fight the person who made that comment and everyone who upvoted it. Calliope died all alone and Roxy couldn't save her, and now they're getting to talk again! Roxy can wait a little longer to meet Rose, this is important stuff that's going on. I am defensive of little green skull monsters.
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According to this old otf_wank thread, Aromaleigh, the company that made the eyeshadow I've been using, was putting toxic crap in its eyeshadow. The thread also said that it was shutting down, but apparently it's still there?

Anyway, I'm throwing those guys' eyeshadow out and using some no-brand stuff I got at the 100-yen store three years ago instead. I feel confident that that's safer.
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I googled "wholesale mineral cosmetics" to see how much it would cost to actually assemble a Dwarf Fortress eyeshadow line - I'm not going to, but the answer is, "less than $200." This place, which was the first thing that showed up on Google, will sell you a 1-oz bag of eyeshadow for $11, and they've got the little sifter jars for $25 for 100. I could get the labels printed up at a place in town for $50, and then all that remains is to set up an Etsy storefront with a super-classy logo:

BADGER SOW IS NO LONGER ENRAGED COSMETICS: CAUSE WHAT ARE YOU DOING BUYING COSMETICS IF THE BADGER SOW IS STILL ENRAGED, I MEAN COME ON

I found this website advertising its makeup as "gluten-free." Oh, yeah? Well my mineral foundation is 100% guaranteed not to contain the fat of unbaptized infants. No other line of cosmetics makes that particular promise. That means I win.

BADGER SOW IS NO LONGER ENRAGED COSMETICS: 100% HAUNTING DUST FREE, HAND-BLENDED BY ALIVE HANDS STILL ATTACHED TO PEOPLE, NOT SEVERED ONES REANIMATED BY NECROMANCERS

What I'm trying to say is that makeup doesn't ordinarily have any goddamn gluten in it. It's not a banana muffin.
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Someone on Reddit had a play session of roughly ordinary productivity:

The partial skeleton of a kobold thief animated and is now my fortress' guardian....

This is in a "Wilderness Biome" nowhere near any kind of evil. It only attacks goblin invaders/thieves and ignores my dwarves. I'm not even sure if it's moving when a goblin isn't near it.

Is this some kind of awesome bug?

EDIT: My guardian betrayed me... EDIT 2: Necromancers. They found the goblins their kobold insider killed. 10% of the population died before I could react EDIT 3: 25% EDIT 4: 4 Necromancers dead. 3 Hammer Lords tantrumming. 50% dead. Still more undead roaming...how many more necromancers could their possibly be? EDIT 5: 70% dead. Entire squad of Axe Lords is dead. Only 3 of the 10 hammer lords remain. 0/6 sword masters, 1 swordsdorf. All marksdwarves are dead. All speardwarves are dead.

EDIT 6: 12 dwarves remain. The last Hammer Lord is now rampaging in the deepest levels of the fort. His old friends and many of their body parts rampage above. The remaining necromancers have not shown their faces.

EDIT 7: A carpenter has elected himself mayor. He stands alone in his bedroom. The undead howl and pound at his door. An additional undead siege has arrived to make things more FUN. 232 undead await. 1 dwarf is alive.
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Gray face paint, in case you want to cosplay as a troll.

A red cane, in case you want to cosplay as Terezi, specifically.

3D glasses, in case you want to cosplay as Sollux, specifically.

Detective Pony (Pony Pals #17), in case you are intrigued by the deathless prose sampled here.

Never Trust a Troll! #18 (Dragon Slayers' Academy), I guess because Amazon's search algorithm has basically attained sentience at this point.
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john196920022001: The only legal function ordained ministers have is performing marriages. I think this is the only issue where we need some kind of ordained officiant. I am already and ordained minister so I could perform a Pastafarian marriage if members are serious about the Pastafarian marriage issue.

Moral Minority: Only a pirate captain can perform a marriage ceremony, so you had better get yourself a cutlass, pistol, pirate regallia and a parrot.

john196920022001: That's fine if there is a provision available to do marriages. Is there some kind of official ordination to authorize Pastafarian pirate captains to marry? My main concern is to make sure the marriage is legal

Imber: What about the law that allows a ships captain to marry people as long as the boat is at sea? The only question then would be how long ago a Pirate Captain would have had to steal the boat to have it be considered his/hers. : )

evilbelgian: I think we honestly need a more realistic way to ordain our 'priests' than "sail the seven seas scavenging for loot". Still a formal ceremony would be awesome.

Zankou 2.0: There's no formality in piracy.


- a thread on the Flying Spaghetti Monster message boards
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He created a macro! I also like how, when the Department of Justice dude couldn't resize an image, House offered to help, in his capacity as the nerd in the room.

Sad thing.

Jul. 7th, 2012 02:00 pm
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I saw this ad on a message board while looking up "cooked broccoli refrigerator":

Read more... )

It's not a joke; it leads to this page selling "the only steroid-shopping guide you'll ever need! Find anything you want to achieve the ideal physique, saving money and not getting caught!"

I had not really been aware of what body image issues looked like for guys. Marvel and DC have a lot to answer for.
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Hahaha!

(Mom just called and told me, I was afraid to check the news.)
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* Trying to get a functioning tamped-down-type Dwarf Fortress (no aboveground contact). Progress is slow due to huge irritating migrant waves, requiring more wood than my subterranean farms are yet producing. I should just lock them out and let them starve.

* The SCP Foundation, a series of horror/fantasy/sci-fi stories in the form of wiki entries describing strange objects/people that the Foundation is keeping contained for the good of mankind; SCP stands for Special Containment Procedures. These are my favorites:

SCP-173 - A statue. This was the first one and is the most-linked-to; I found it on Reddit week-before-last, and promptly spent the rest of the evening clicking around. No one on the whole internet knows where that picture actually came from.

SCP-962 - A tower.

SCP-426 - A toaster.

SCP-701 - A Caroline-era revenge tragedy in five acts.

SCP-455 - A shipwreck.

SCP-662 - A bell.

SCP-453 - A night club.

SCP-1981 - A tape of a Ronald Reagan speech.

SCP-1867 - A sea slug.

SCP-1733 - A tape of a basketball game.

SCP-___-J - A rock.

SCP-093 - A thing that sits on a mirror. This one includes an unusually long narrative about the exploration of an alternate reality; very good, but I feel like it needs to be either edited down a lot or fifty pages longer.

SCP-682 - A very mean lizard who is the protagonist of the wiki. The page detailing all the attempts to kill it is funny.
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I had seen this picture before, but I hadn't realize it was official art. Please note the reference photo Edgeworth's got there.

Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 8


Does this cross the "goggles required" line?

View Answers

Yes.
4 (50.0%)

No, Maya's presence creates sufficient ambiguity.
4 (50.0%)



This quote about Lang is also great:

Originally the designer wanted him to be shirtless, but was told no. So he gave Lang a feather boa, figuring that if his nipples were covered that would make it okay, but it didn't. He even tried to justify it by saying Lang was in astronomy club in high school, and he wanted to show off the 7 scars on his chest that make up the constellation Orion. The director did not buy that either.


How many of the Phoenix Wright people just wandered over from some kind of bara game studio? (Bara game studios do exist, right?)
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Fistfight at the symphony:

The concert never stopped, but Muti shot a glance over his left shoulder toward the box where the punches were thrown. One concert-goer described the look as “dagger eyes.”

Robinson said Muti merely paused longer than would be expected and then continued on to the third movement — after getting a signal from someone up in the box.

“Mind you, he never stopped conducting,” Robinson said. “He very gracefully, without missing a beat — literally — he brought [the second movement] to a very quiet and subdued close, while still looking over his left shoulder.”
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I can't do anything about it, so I decided to get anxious about internet privacy instead, because of this sort of stuff. So I installed Ghostery and Do Not Track Plus, and switched my default search engine from Google to DuckDuckGo. Then I laid my bloody palm across my face and tore Google CEO Eric Schmidt to pieces with my bare hands, unless I in fact merely watched more Baccano! and subsequently confused it with real life. I'm worried that my personal metaphors may be getting too violent recently.

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The contents of this blog and all comments I make are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike License. I hope that name is long enough. I could add some stuff. It could also be a Bring Me A Sandwich License.

If you desire to thank me for the pretend internet magnanimity I show by sharing my important and serious thoughts with you, I accept pretend internet dollars (Bitcoins): 19BqFnAHNpSq8N2A1pafEGSqLv4B6ScstB