Dec. 7th, 2015 07:58 pm
At least, when the vessel of boiling water shattered in my hand and splashed me, the burns were not two inches lower; I would be at the World’s Worst ER right now. As it is, I cannot post pictures without landing this blog with an NSFW tag.

This is a wildly inappropriate way for karma to repay me for spending the afternoon doing volunteer nerd stuff and cleaning my parents’ kitchen.

is putting rice in the rice cooker for in the morning, even though I'm not hungry right now.
This evening's anxiety-fueled research project was pet tracking technology. Because what if Bu gets lost, like Polly did. One of these Bluetooth trackers looks like the most reliable option at the moment, and they don't seem to actually be all that reliable.
He comes running whenever he thinks I'm stressed out. He's not really competent for the job, though. For example, he thinks that running water is a sign of emotional stress! It's clearly self-destructive behavior - he would never turn on a faucet or take a shower, he knows better.

He feels similarly about coding or writing fanfic, but he's probably mostly right about that.

He also thinks that sinking his claws into a human is how you calm them down. I know he's just trying to knead, but I'm neither wearing a thick coat of fur nor producing milk, and he's an unusually pointy cat - seriously, razor-sharp. I suspect I'm going to end up with at least one scar on my stomach as a result of his efforts to heal my wounded soul on Saturday. Cut for slightly gross:

Read more... )

Nov. 25th, 2015 02:18 pm
I'm going to embrace my true nature and write letters to companies complaining that their products don't have functional handles and as an arthritis sufferer, etc.
I sent this email the other day. I feel that it basically sums up the impression I give IRL. Once you have read it, you will have officially met me.

"Okay. Black tea, chamomile, lavender, vanilla, or other?

Also, is there a beige argyle sweatervest over there somewhere? I have lost my beige argyle sweatervest and it's interfering with my ability to be a huge asshole effectively."
Does anyone know of any good reason I shouldn't use Mustache, or have strong feelings either way about Liquid?

ERB, HAML, and SLIM are not acceptable for my purposes - basically every page needs to be safely and relatively-unchallengingly end-user-customizable.

Why

Nov. 22nd, 2015 05:29 pm
my cat when I get in the shower every single morning: *whine whine yowl yowl heartbroken crying nyehhhhhh* continuously until I get back out

my cat every time he realizes I'm under the blankets in bed: *pats and experimentally scratches around the blankets for at least five minutes to make sure he knows exactly where every part of my body can be found*

my cat at dawn every single morning: *tries to claw his way under my bedroom door*

my cat when I accidentally shut him in an empty room: *peaceful and silent acceptance of his situation for the entirety of the >2 hours it takes for me to notice that he's missing*

By which I mean my face. My face is the problematic face. I know I've been whining more about it than usual lately, but that's actually because I've actually had fewer lumpy painful crises than usual. They feel less fair now.

The reason I am investigating the Korean skin-care fandom is that I accidentally duplicated a part of "The Process" a while back, and found that it seemed to help.

What I did a couple mornings in a row while very groggy:

Cut for boring. )
(With a break in the middle because I always wake up at least once in the night now.)

I was thinking when I woke up a little while ago "this is totally unreasonable why did I do this," but,

* I drove five hours yesterday, which is more driving than I've done since March, I think.

* The day before that, because Mom's been feeling bad and was out of town for the day, I decided to sterilize and scrub every single dish in her kitchen (because Dad puts dirty stuff in the cabinets and she shouldn't need to wash a dish every time she eats) + also the sink and counters + everything else I could reach that seemed to need washed + also clean the living room.

* I have also recently scrubbed down and cleaned out the kitchen and bathroom over *here,* assembled a chair and a "fantasy humidifier," and coded so much I'm dreaming about parameter mismatch error messages.

* And also I am doing IT shit requiring that I communicate verbally with people and leave the house? And most of those people are not nerds and don't understand why it is bad that to click on banner ads that say they have a virus.

* Have not commonly been sleeping through the night.

Nov. 15th, 2015 09:34 pm
I conked out for a while and woke up with the conviction that I had, at some point, seen a Tumblr audio post upon which one of the rebloggers had commented “it sounds like they got mugged by Patrick Wolf during the second chorus.”

Is this a real post. What does it sound like when they get mugged by Patrick Wolf during the second chorus. I don’t understand what that means. I want to understand.

(#help me #(it's probably not a real post) #(why must my subconscious do this to me) #(i want to hear the song where patrick wolf mugs someone)
Shoyeido Hoyei-koh + Al-Rehab Silver (the really good Silver Mountain Water knock-off) = ideal.

I wasn't initially sure about either one individually, but I combined them the other day, and now I think they're both great. Very good inexpensive Odor Experience.
He will probably not actually invest in my mustard mines, or even post about how my mustard mines would be a good investment, but I can ALMOST CERTAINLY get him to post about how Wall Street is starting to take notice of the surprising new economic trend that is mustard mining in Appalachia, which is revitalizing dying rural communities, and coincidentally his primary source is an article which only quotes me, the owner of an up-and-coming mustard mining company.

#disruptive new mustard mining technologies, #are behind this unexpected revolution in mustard mining, #while mustard has long been known to occur in karst terrain, #the risks associated with reaching it, #(territorial dwarves, #balrogs, #mimigas, #and Flowey the Flower), #had heretofore rendered it a dangerous and unprofitable

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The contents of this blog and all comments I make are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike License. I hope that name is long enough. I could add some stuff. It could also be a Bring Me A Sandwich License.

If you desire to thank me for the pretend internet magnanimity I show by sharing my important and serious thoughts with you, I accept pretend internet dollars (Bitcoins): 19BqFnAHNpSq8N2A1pafEGSqLv4B6ScstB